Need your prayers

[Pamelajo]

After surviving 2 heart attacks last spring and finally starting to get back to his old self last month Dad developed pneumonia a couple of weeks ago. After a round of antibiotics he still was not feeling any better, last Friday he got the results of the cat scan back and he has lung cancer. It is advanced and surgery is not an option. From what we know it is only in one lung. Today he went for a biopsy and the results were to be in at the end of the month, but the doctor has put a rush on it and should have results back in 10 days. He has lost over 40 lbs, when I was up to see him on the weekend I got him started on supplements and he at least feels a little better and eating better.

I am hoping to get my unit completed before next weekend so I can get up again. Trying to stay focused has been extremely difficult and having only every other weekend off is not ideal right now.

So now we are just waiting and praying.

[Katalyst]

You & you family are all in my prayers Pam. Your Dad's one tough cookie, I'm sure he'll be yelling for hamburgers in no time. Hang in there kiddo we're all pulling for him!

[CACAdmin]

This is a difficult time for you and your family Pam. :hugs: I think one of the hardest things is the waiting and not knowing the results of the biospy so I'm glad the doctor put a rush on it.

You've got a lot on your plate right now but sometimes that's good. It'll help keep with the waiting.

Your Dad's been through a lot be he's tough and a survivor, Pam. If anyone can beat this he can (especially with the love and support of his family).

Just know our hearts are with you through this. :grouphug:

[Melody]

What horrible news - you must be going insane with worrying. Units can wait - they'll excuse you for family illness. Take care & lean heavily, that's what we're here for!

[GaryofMontreal]

My thoughts are with you. As Melody said, if leaning helps, we're here.

[Pamelajo]

Thanks everyone!! Consider me leaning on all of you.

[thegrandpoohbah]

Cancer is never fun. Hope everything works out.

[Gramma]

What awful news! It makes for a very stressful and difficult time for you and your family. Waiting for results seems to take forever. Hang in there and take one day at a time. My thoughts are with you.:hugs:

[OldMan]

I am pulling for you Pam. A few years ago my family had to go through this with me. I had a serious cancer that hit me as something I had to deal with but I am afraid it hit my wife and family harder than it did me. For me it was simply dealing with the reality of my illness and deciding that I would not give up to some silly cancer. For the family it was quite stressful, which I never really understood at the time. I have never found myself on your side of things but can totally empathize with what you are going through and wish there was something I could do to help. All of my prayers go out to you and your dad in this time of your need.

[hp10BII]

You have my prayers, Pam.

[Pamelajo]

Thanks Ed.
Talked to him last night and he sounded good, said he did not have any energy today. But he did manage to go sit in Fred's stall when it was feeding time. Which probably drove him crazy. Cathy told me a while back he had banned her from the barn a feeding time, cause she just causes chaos. Kim took him up lots to eat and he was already digging in the bag of goodies I sent.

[Melody]

Thanks for the update, I've been fretting about you both. How are you holding up Luv? Are you able to rest at all?

[Pamelajo]

I am finally back to sleeping a full night, but last week was not good. A friend called Saturday night and we went for a walk, and again last night which will help with the some of the stress and my blood pressure. Kelsey and I used to walk 45 everyday, but with this course it has been hit and miss with the walks. I am trying to stay positive while waiting for the results, but I still have my bad moments.

[Pamelajo]

Dad's older sister who is an RN arrived up there yesterday and is staying close by at her daughters and it sounds like she may stay awhile. I am so happy she could come and be close.

[CACAdmin]

That must be a relief to you that she's close by.

[Soggybottom]

Best wishes Pam Family!

I hope you are all out on that sleigh again next winter!

[Pamelajo]

Thanks Soggy we are hoping for the best prognosis.

[Melody]

I'm glad to hear that a family nurse will be around. It makes a big difference when you have someone there who can understand and translate. :hugs:

[sass]

Best wishes for you Pamelajo and your dad.
My father has had to stop doing chores because of health and can understand the effects it has on well being.
Take some time for yourself and stay strong.

[Katalyst]

I'm so glad to hear his sister is coming and will be close by. Hows the eating going?

[Gobies et al]

Thinking of you, Pam! :hugs:

How's your Dad? Are the biopsy results back yet? Have they said which type of lung cancer it is and what stage? Any treatment plan?

I hope having your Aunt there, is helpful. Sometimes, having the nursing background creates more waves. Did she have a specialty?

Remember, you are stronger than you think, and you are a survivor! :yes:

[Pamelajo]

I talked to Dad last night, he is having more difficulty time with out coughing. Tires extremely easy. Cathy's mom is there helping with the cooking, but went to church so Dad made spaghetti for supper and it wiped him out.
I just found out about the diagnosis, but not sure what his prognosis is. He has non small cell lung cancer stage 3 and gone into the lymph nodes. The respiratory doctors say they have a couple of options but want to do chemo and radiation, never told them the rest. They are getting back to them with the oncologist appointment who I think is better at explaining things. He is still loosing weight, so I have upped his supplements to 6 times a day. Cathy's mother bought him a lazy boy for down stairs so he does not always have to go upstairs to lay down. He is also not sleeping, not because he is coughing just can't sleep understandable. They have given him sleeping pills, but last night they did not work. Sleeping pills only help put you to sleep, don't keep you asleep unfortunately. I will be heading up next weekend and they are emailing me a website with some info on the cancer the dr suggested they read. He oxygen levels are still too high for oxygen to be covered, so he is not on oxygen. They will be doing a bone scan to see if the cancer cells have moved into the bones.

Thanks Gerry.

[CACAdmin]

Thanks for keeping us updated, Pam. I don't know much about cancer so can't offer any insight. I think you'll probably have a clearer understanding of the options once they have spoken to the oncologist. We're all concerned and know how upsetting an worrysome this is for you. As you can tell, you have quite a few friends who are here here for you. :grouphug:

[Pamelajo]

As you can tell, you have quite a few friends who are here here for you. :grouphug:
And I thank you all for being here helping me through this.

[OldMan]

Still wishing you and your dad all the best Pamelajo. I really wish there was something more we could do to help but our prayers are with you tonight. Watch out for your dad losing too much weight, I am one of those people that doctors are always telling to lose a little weight but lost 50 pounds during radiation therapy and it scared the doctors. It was not a healthy way to lose weight.

[Pamelajo]

Thanks Oldman, he has already lost 40 when I was up the first time, and now more I already had him on homemade supplement pudding as it tastes better than any boughten stuff, but no one was making it regularly for him. So I emailed a bunch of specific instructions. I was scared that when he starts treatment like yourself he would loose a lot which right now he can not afford.
Your prayers are all I ask for, but you wanting to do more gives me comfort in knowing I have some awesome friends here. Thanks, I always knew this forum had some very special members.

[neon]

Hi Pam....even though we don't know each other yet, I just want to wish your dad a great success with his chemo.


I have been through chemo and radiation....and if I can ever be of help, please let me know if you have any questions or concerns........


Chemo is extremely draining.

- and you will still need the supplements as your dad will have no appetite...what I found very helpful was to put a banana and yogurt in a blender...it whips up thick and is really nutritious for you.



for your dad:

970

[Pamelajo]

Thanks neon and for the tip.
What did you undergo chemo and radiation for? I assume cancer, but what type? You can pm me if not comfortable posting here. Thanks.

[neon]

Thanks neon and for the tip.
What did you undergo chemo and radiation for? I assume cancer, but what type? You can pm me if not comfortable posting here. Thanks.


Hi Pam..........I just send you an email..xo

[Katalyst]

Thinking of you and your Dad, Pam. Hang in there kiddo. If you ever need to talk give me a shout. If you ever need a fish sitter or a water changer or anything else give me a call and I'll be there.

[Killiejoe]

Just want to let you know that your father is in our family`s prayers. Keep your faith strong Pam.

[Pamelajo]

Got your email neon.
Thanks Kat, and Joe.
My brother and his wife + seven kids and us will be going up on Friday and my other brother may be coming up too, not sure if my sister is going up. So the bunch of us will be together for good Friday, which has not happened since he moved. I just hope we do not tire him out too much, but he seems to be better for a few days after we have been there.

[CACAdmin]

That's sounds great, Pam. I'm sure he'll enjoy having the family around. More hands to do things. And with that many around he won't feel like he's neglecting company when he heads off for a nap (he'll figure you can entertain yourselves.)

[Laura]

It sounds like a full house! That's great that you all get to be together for the holiday weekend.
Best wishes to you and your family.

[Melody]

I remember fearing the unknown the most so I relate and feel horrible for you and your family. Don't place too much faith in the first prognosis - they had me making final arrangements before they upgraded my prognosis. I hope you & yours have the most incredible family Easter ever - you deserve it. :hugs:

[Pamelajo]

Thanks guys, I talked to him last night and his spirits are good. He taste buds are changing, he says pretty much everything tastes terrible. Even the stuff he loves. I told him to maybe try the stuff he hates, but the list is very short bananas and jello. He is looking forward to us visiting. I have assigned the men to fix the driveway, before a car disappears in one of the holes. Dad has not been able to grade it since his heart attack and it is such a mess. Fred and I will be hanging out when Dad is napping. For those of you who do not know Fred see pic below.

Thanks guys! We are kind of taking it day by day and trying to get there as much as possible.

[Katalyst]

Have a great time Pam! Keeping thinking positive hon! Give Fred a carrot for me! He's a beautiful horse!

[neon]

Got your email neon.
Thanks Kat, and Joe.
My brother and his wife + seven kids and us will be going up on Friday and my other brother may be coming up too, not sure if my sister is going up. So the bunch of us will be together for good Friday, which has not happened since he moved. I just hope we do not tire him out too much, but he seems to be better for a few days after we have been there.


That is nice, spending today together.

975

[Gobies et al]

Fred is a beautiful! He is a Fjord Horse isn't he? They are impressive! :yes:

It's great that the family can get together this holiday. Take lots of pictures! Appetite loss and altered taste is difficult to handle, but that is something you know about. Take care of yourself, and get some sleep. :SLEEP: (Bossy, aren't I!)

My thoughts are with you.:hugs:

[Melody]

Thanks guys, I talked to him last night and his spirits are good. He taste buds are changing, he says pretty much everything tastes terrible. Even the stuff he loves. I told him to maybe try the stuff he hates, but the list is very short bananas and jello. He is looking forward to us visiting. I have assigned the men to fix the driveway, before a car disappears in one of the holes. Dad has not been able to grade it since his heart attack and it is such a mess. Fred and I will be hanging out when Dad is napping. For those of you who do not know Fred see pic below.

Thanks guys! We are kind of taking it day by day and trying to get there as much as possible.


You just had to tease me with that horse, didn't you? Tell Dad I'm coming too. Don't worry, I'll help with the driveway - I'm not a bit afraid of getting my fingernails dirty...

They won't break, will they?

:laugh:

Sounds like that sunshiney heart of yours is going to help you through :yes: .

[Pamelajo]

Thanks Gerry and not your not bossy and yes he is a Fjord, they are like big dogs and extremely clever.

They might break Mel, you can walk a horse there are plenty to chose from Lorne easy going), Princess(likes feet) and Small Class(bit of a snob, thoroughbred:rolleyes:and some days has an attitude). Your nails should be safe enough doing that. Princess and Lorne are half siblings of Fred's, they have the same father.

You guys always make me smile.:hugs::Flowers3:

Have a great weekend!!! Talk to you all on Sunday evening.

[Melody]

How did Dad seem while you visited, Pam?

[Pamelajo]

He seemed okay, lost more weight. He ate very little at lunch, but ate two helpings of the supper we brought. Slept better while we were there only up once. No word on when they are starting chemo.

[Melody]

Sounds like he enjoyed your visit. Nothing like family support!

[Pamelajo]

Talked to Dad last night, they can not do chemo as the dosage needed to fight the cancer would give him a fatal heart, there is some talk of radiation still. The prognosis is 8 - 12 months, at the rate it has been going I am very thankful that we still have that amount of time left with him. He is on medication for the acid in his system and is eating with out gagging thanks to it, also has oxygen and a magnetic bed. He says he is feeling not too bad and is not sure which is responsible but is thankful. I kind of think the radiation is a palliative measure, and don't want to come right out and ask him. Hoping between the doctor and the natural path treatments that they will be able to extend his prognosis, but also don't want him to suffer for a few extra days. His oldest brother got up to see him today and they had a very nice time reminiscing.

[Melody]

Oh my God Pam, I'm so sorry to hear that. I'm glad you have some more time with him but man what a rough road ahead. It sounds like you're both being very brave, but don't be afraid to lean on your friends. I seriously want to hug you right now... but I'll just have a good cry for you instead. He has been so blessed to have you as a daughter, that much I know.

[CACAdmin]

This kind of news is never easy, nor will the time ahead be but I know you will treasure however much time you do have with your Dad. I'm glad to hear he's at least more comfortable than he has been.
:grouphug: Although we can't do this in person, please know that we would if we could.

[Pamelajo]

:grouphug: Although we can't do this in person, please know that we would if we could.


I do know.:hugs: It still has the same effect as an "in person hug" and if your wondering why you all have damp shoulders that is from all the tears you don't see.

People who do not believe that you can have true friendships with people you have never met are missing out on some very special friends.

[Melody]

:yes:

[sass]

Thinking of you and wish to send best wishes at this most difficult time.
How nice for your family to get together at Easter for your dad.
Having gone through a similar situation with my mom in 2000, being the primary caregiver I can feel what you are going through.
Remember to take care of yourself and stay stong.
I too spent an incredible amount of time with the horses, and it eased the pain somewhat.

[Namor]

Pam, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
It sounds like your Dad and his brother had a nice time reminiscing.
(I bet they have some great stories).
Stay strong, and take comfort in knowing that having loved ones around really is key.

[Pamelajo]

My sister talked to his wife yesterday and she told her 6-12 months and that the radiation would only be for relief of pain, it may stop the cancer for sometime, but won't get rid of it.

I called him tonight and he sounded good, and has been feeling better since Friday. Medication is really helping, he now eating a lot better. No vomiting or gagging. A lot less coughing. He says the magnetic bed helps move the oxygen around in the blood stream and he feels refreshed (kind of, was not sure how to describe it) after laying on it. Sounds like the oxygen he is on is getting through out his system more effectively with the magnetic bed.

[CACAdmin]

It's a difficult time for you Pam, but I'm sure you take comfort in knowing he's eating and feeling better.

[Melody]

That's interesting about the magnetic bed. I'm glad he's feeling as well as can be expected.:hugs:

[Pamelajo]

He was feeling good enough to harass me. Yes I always feel better when he is feeling better.

See Jay I come by it honestly, he gets it from his mom.

It is funny, growing up I was the only one of the four of us that caused him any grief. Mainly because I did not hide anything from him and mom and I am the closest.

[CACAdmin]

That's good to hear... and for once I'm sure you didn't mind him harrassing you one bit. As for it being a family trait and thus an excuse for you to harrass me, I'll have to think that one over.:wink:

[Pamelajo]

I just can't help myself, honest!!!!::D::Angel:

[OldMan]

I think the harassment is a show of strength Pam. I am encouraged by his ability to show that bit of gumption when dealing with the family.To me it means he has not given up on living his life. I am a cancer survivor and can appreciate the situation that your dad is finding himself in. He probably does not feel as bad himself as people think he does and so has a hard time relating to your feelings about his condition. If he is anything like me, he goes about his daily life much like anyone else, living each moment a day at a time. We all are doomed to die from birth and, unless we become too morbid about it, we all enjoy the time that we have available. I realize it is not easy for you, but he would be best served by being able to interact with you as if he had an infinite time left and plans for next year were as easy to make as plans for next week. The idea that he may not be around next year is not a personal perspective but is an outside perspective. Been there, done that.
I don't want to bring you down but please work with him as if there is no limit to his abilities even though you have information that says it is not true. From the perspective of the cancer patient, life goes on until people outside of yourself begin to act like it is not true. People never were given a time line on me but my survival was only ranked as 80% that I would make it 3 years. That was 7 years ago and I never, repeat never, felt that my situation was hopeless. The hopes that I retained were my salvation and my comfort. I was allowed to believe that there was a chance that I would survive and proved to all that I would be a part of the group that does survive. It is a mental health issue for me to think of myself as a survivor.
My heart goes out to you because you are in a tougher spot than your dad. He knows what he has ahead of him and is probably working, as I did, to beat the odds. You can't feel that determination personally so it is harder for you to bear. My prayers go out to you and I wish I were in a position to give you the needed hugs.

[Pamelajo]

Thanks for the advice, we do try to let him continue on like he used to for the most part and try to carry on like normal. But some stuff he has not been able to do since his heart attack. When I go up I have always taken over the cooking for the 4 years he has been there, to give him a break so he is used to that. (He has done all the cooking since he got remarried 17 years ago or as he says he would have starved to death years ago)
I have hopes that he will surprise the drs and outlive their prognosis. He loves his farm and horse too much to give up easily. Talking to survivors like yourself also gives me hope.
Really glad you beat it and that I got a chance to meet/harass you.

[Melody]

He doesn't strike me as the type who would choose to live another 20 years if he had to do it in a wheelchair or otherwise not be well enough to move about. I'm sure he'll be in that barn for as long as he is able and after that, he'll probably be just as happy to say goodnight. We can try to be happy for him when we look at it like that. I hope he proves them all wrong and is visiting that barn for a long time to come. :hugs:

[Pamelajo]

Ernest Neil Thompson died peacefully, surrounded by his family in the early morning of Thursday, May 21, 2009. Born in Singhampton, he had, as he described, a 40 year hiatus in SW Ontario before returning to beautiful Grey County in 2004.
Ernest especially enjoyed family get-togethers – the quiet ones and the busy and hectic. He spoke fondly of his softball and hockey coaching days. The door at his beloved farm was open and the coffee pot always on for his friends, old and new. He considered the fine folk at Elmwood United Church his extended family. Missing church suppers and garden parties were simply not an option for Ernie. Ernie loved pie.

Seven years ago, a hefty fellow measuring 14.2 hands, sporting a white and black mohawk, a yellow coat and a kind eye came into Ernest’s life and things were never the same after that. How Ernie loved his fjord horse, Fred. What a team! Ernie always took the utmost care as he hitched Fred to the buggy or bob sleigh; and when it came time to unharness, Ernie fairly beamed as he thanked Fred for yet another good job. Ernie took real pleasure introducing Fred to visitors; he found great joy sharing Fred with family and friends. Many children had their first riding lesson on patient Fred.

Ernie, we look out to the hills and fields of the farm, and we can almost see your face; everywhere we step on the farm, we can feel your gentle, gentle spirit.

Bye for now, dear Ernest.
‘Til we meet again.

[Namor]

:hugs: My thoughts are with you and your family Pam.

[CACAdmin]

That's a beautiful tribute to your Dad, Pam. A lovely way to honor him and share a little of him and his life with us. Thank you for doing so. Thinking of you right now and hoping that in time the memories of your Dad will fill your heart and help to ease the sorrow.:hugs:

[Melody]

The best eulogies are the kind that inspire misty-eyed smiles. Mission accomplished :Smile: . I wish I'd had the chance to meet your Dad, Pam, he sounds like my kinda person. I'm lucky enough to call his daughter a friend though, so I guess I'm meeting him after all. I bet he was bursting with pride when you pulled off your latest accomplishment in furthering your education. I'm so glad you had a chance to tell him about it.

I wish I could make it easier for you Darlin'... if you need an ear, a virtual hug or a shoulder, just say the word and those instant messengers get the dust blown off them.

[Pamelajo]

Mel he would have liked you too and all your sassyness!

[hp10BII]

Pam, my condolences to you and your family. Dad sounded like a down to earth man that anybody would be blessed and honoured to call a friend.

[GaryofMontreal]

That's a fine tribute, Pam. He raised good kids. Take care.

[Gobies et al]

My condolences for your loss. The best of him lives on in you!

:hugs:

[OldMan]

My condolences Pam. My thoughts are with you in this difficult time. It sure sounds like your father is someone I would have loved to call my friend.

[Laura]

That is a beautiful tribute - thank you for sharing a part of your dad with us.
My thoughts are with you and your family.